Tag Archives: dressage judges horse and hound

Success

9 Mar

A sad thing about success is that in addition to it breeding jealousy, it also breeds inevitable sale, which also breeds gossip (which horse people are especially good at and enjoy).

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a really successful horse is for sale at the right price; this is after all a business, but with desperate buyers demanding ready-made success at any price (it being boring and difficult to train your own) for their vaguely talented offspring/pet professional/or patriotic pride. Whilst true that you cannot win without the right horse the alacrity with which people can throw their money at success without thought or care to how it looks to others remains extraordinary. Actually they do not care as when you win all that is forgotten and no-one else cares either, and as long as everyone knows how much you spent and where you got it, heaven help the judge who marks you down.

Post Championship fervour will no doubt result in the socialistic redistribution of talent and wealth across the globe. And much fun for the rumour mongers.

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More Shoes

27 Dec

OMG. I thought that all that could have been said about shoes had been. How foolish a Funder!

Accepting that it is simply impossible to get shoeing right (and trust me the level of abject and desperate misery that shoeing can drive the Funded to knows no bounds), it is nonetheless wholly in the spirit of the shoemaker to Imelda Marco that I take my hat off to the latest fad of rubberised stick-ons. What could be better for a horse than no nails. Well, first they give all farriers another opportunity to suck their teeth and say that it is simply impossible to shoe X until they have had more growth and in the meantime a rubber stick on has to be the answer. If only the Funded had come to them first and not their competitor (the reason usually being of course the recommendation of a very important “name” or vet). So the conversation goes ” whoever did this cut off too much [hoof/heel/toe] and it is now too [long/short/low/high], and definitely not “balanced”]. Sadly without the new [very expensive] stick on shoe and lots of remediation this [very expensive] horse will suffer [immediate/lingering] death from [navicular/laminitis/pedal bone drop(whatever that is)/etc etc].

How fortunate it is that such a marvellous remedy can be applied. A phenomenon at half the price…………..until the wretched beast has the temerity to wear it in a [muddy] field, and off it comes.

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Selling a Horse

31 Mar
SELLING
Whisper the word quietly as the Funded finds selling their horse akin to selling a favourite family member into slavery and likely death. For this reason, whilst buying a horse is relatively easy and allows the tendency of Dalmatian plantation creation, selling is rather more tricky. The psychological impact and scars are clear, but the intricacies and practicalities of the sale merit detailed analysis.
WHY SELL? – why indeed.
  • There comes a point in even the richest funded’s life when there are simply more stables than horses. This is a sustainable model during the summer when you can pretend that there is plenty of room, but as autumn and then winter draw in so the horrible realisation dawns that choices have to be made.
  • Alternatively, a Funded’s herd built up to support a number of children becomes suddenly difficult to sustain as those children showing little appreciation of the damage they are causing have the temerity to grow up, leave home, lose interest AND fail to produce grandchildren sufficiently quickly to allow smooth transition and succession
  • Money of course has never been a legitimate reason for the Funded to be asked to reduce their flock, and this will never be a genuine reason for sale.

To be continued

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Experts

22 Jan

There is no such thing

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Paying Judges

15 Jan

What an excellent idea. Whilst at first glance this simply adds more expense to an already expensive activity, at least it will help pay for glasses, coffee to keep awake during tests and make all test more susceptible to judicial review.

And we all thought they did it for fun like the rest of us.

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